||[Nov. 16th, 2008|07:26 am]
|||||awake and hopeful||]|
|||||Sophia (Album Version) - The Cruxshadows||]|
I realized I wasn't getting back to sleep at about 6:20 this morning. But, and this is really important, I didn't feel tired. After chatting with eclesis for thirty minutes or so, I decided I was feeling a bit fatigued after all and tried to lie down, only to discover that I actually wasn't really all that tired. So I got back up and had breakfast.
It's 7:30. I'm having a bit of trouble assessing my wakefulness, but I don't feel as bone-dead tired as I've felt for, oh, years now. Just a hair of "maybe I should be sleeping." Maybe it is too early. I went to bed at around 1:30 this morning, so technically I didn't get nearly enough sleep. That said, when I was in high school and writing, for a couple of days I went to bed at 8pm and woke up at 2am to start writing, so maybe my actual sleep requirements are just six hours?
I don't know whether it's a placebo effect or whether the sun lamp is meaningfully altering my chemistry. I'm worried it's just a temporary flux, that in a couple of days I'll crash and I'll be back to sleeping too much. It wouldn't be a bad thing to sleep more -- I'll take at least 6 hours for $1000, Alex -- and maybe I've built up a sleep credit or something that's keeping me awake.
But I'm awake.
I'm finally awake.